Romney Denies Being a “Tool”

Mitt Romney called "Tool" by autoworkers and President Obama

COLUMBUS, OHIO      Mitt Romney was called a “tool” by autoworkers for advocating letting the Big 3 automakers go bankrupt and putting them and a million other supporting business employees out of a job. Romney misread the middle-class “tool” message and taking it as a compliment, celebrated, as noted in the picture.

President Obama used the word “tool” differently, saying in his opening campaign speeches that Mitt Romney was a tool of the congressional Republicans.

Romney was quick to hotly deny this, saying,

“Not one owner I know of a major sports franchise or race car team  agrees with President Obama that I am a tool or a tool of Republicans. All the other millions in the middle-class who call me a “tool” are just jealous of my success.”

Romney used the Reagan trope at a recent campaign stop, “Are you better off than you were four years ago?” When a large number of people shouted back, “Yes, we’re working now!” a miffed  Mitt declared, “We’ll I’m not better off because I had to close my Swiss bank accounts!”

President Obama roundly criticized Romney for endorsing Republican Paul Ryan’s “Path to Prosperity” budget, laughingly but secretly referred to by congressional Republicans as Ryan’s “Let them Eat Cake” budget.

Romney countered, saying,

“Any fool can see that lowering taxes for the wealthiest increases wealth for the wealthiest; that’s the whole point, Silly.  But in our benign goodness, we of the patrician class will look down upon you middle and lower-class piss-ants and trickle-down some of our wealth upon you…. but not from funds held in Swiss bank accounts  and not yet taxed.”

When asked how the “Trickle-Down” theory could be true when there was no sign of these “trickle-down” economic benefits reaching the middle class a full ten years after Bush’s tax cuts for the wealthiest took effect, Romney countered with,

“That’s not true; most of the middle class got trickled on plenty by Republicans during the Bush years. We just told them it was rain and they believed it. If televangelist ministers can get their evangelical congregations to believe they got trickled on with rain, I simply don’t understand why people who read don’t follow along like sheep and believe it, too.”

On another front, Gov. Rick Perry and Michelle Bachmann issued an  joint statement of emphatic support for Romney’s Republican “Trickle-Down” economics while standing by urinals in a men’s restroom of the Republican National Headquarters wearing commercial fisherman rain gear.



  1. Bart, thanks for getting the message out. Let it be known: Mitt Romney is a tool.

    • Bart Nedelman says:

      Romneycare: it’s hard to trust a man who spits on his own accomplishments and history. Romney’s offshore bank accounts don’t help, either.

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